Remembering Cal Van Dyke
“Not Cal”
Monday mid-morning when I got the first of what would be many contacts concerning Cal’s death, I said out loud (and louder than I should in an open office), “Not Cal”. To which a couple of people responded asking what was up, and I proceeded to tell a very abbreviated version of what had happened and who Cal was, as no one at my current job other than myself had known Cal. “We lost a great guy today, and what a shock.” Going quickly through the stages of grief, I first thought that it must be a mistake, but realized that the folks who were letting me know were some of the most responsible and careful about information like this that I know. Then I wanted to get angry at whatever or whoever or whatever circumstance might have brought this about, but then thought that would not be what Cal would want. Sadness and loss are what followed, and really where we are at today. But also realized that in addition to the loss of Cal, this season and current rules and guidelines would not allow for what friends, and family, and those who Cal touched in life really need which is to mourn, and give our respects, but also meet and tell stories and remember and reflect on who Cal was and what he has meant to so many people. So as memories and thoughts came to mind, I decided to write these down and share them with the people who would share these thoughts, but also for those friends and family that might want to hear a bit more about this great friend, and partner, and man that is no longer with us in person.
Meeting Cal
I met Cal soon after joining Meijer, where I would end up spending the bulk of my career working with computers, and technology, and all that goes with it. When first meeting Cal, I remember first his smile, and his height, which would become something that I could count on every day I saw him for almost 20 years. Through the really fun and exciting days where we were able to collaborate and do some amazing things, do the really hard days where really difficult challenges would be threatening to sink our collective “ship”, Cal was almost always smiling and such a positive, strong, collected, yet calm, and humble through it all. This was an infectious trait in a person as Cal could bring this calmness, positivity, and energy to those around him when we needed it the most.
As I got to know Cal, I realized that he was quite a kindred spirit, and we had a lot in common. I loved Cal’s sense of humor, dry wit, and previously mentioned smile. We were both Calvin College grads, loved living in Michigan, had kids going through a lot of the same stages and challenges of life, and were techies and innovators at heart. Over time I also talked occasionally with Cal about our shared faith and involvement in church and worship and began to see lived out in Cal many of the key teachings of Jesus, which was encouraging to me as well. I have to share one of these, which some will remember, but at work Cal was tasked with doing something that a “normal” person would have really pushed back on or resented or done half-heartedly. Cal got to be the Architect at Meijer who was the primary author of our “Position Paper on XML” — not to get deep into that topic itself, but suffice it to say that it was analogous to having to write a “Position Paper on ‘The World Wide Web’” (will it catch on, is it something Meijer should do?) or “Is E-mail a good idea?” The Architecture group was charged with thinking deeply and documenting new technologies and ideas, and someone had to do this for “XML”. I don’t know if he “drew the short straw” on that one, or more than likely he volunteered to do it as it was going to be the “last choice” on the table. For years to come, whenever some work or task had to be done that felt like busywork, or to “check a box” with leadership, or to research deeply into an “obvious choice” for a particular technology need, we’d joke that “at least it’s not a ‘Position Paper on XML’” and Cal would smile and be the butt of this ongoing joke. But you know what? If you actually took the time to read it, Cal did an amazing job with what would seem like an arduous task — he put a lot of time into it, and research, and made some great points about something others/I might have just “Googled” and summarized and been done with it. He did an amazing job, and I probably joked too much with him about it, but Cal was such a good sport about the whole thing. But I did see the spirit of Christ in all of this — Paul explains that “Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord and not for human masters, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ that you are serving.” And while there is a lot going on there, the part that Cal lived out before us daily was doing amazing and detailed work, no matter what the context or politics or people involved, or how crazy the request was (ala XML), but did a job that reflected well on Cal’s work, but also pointed to the God that we are being an example of and who we are ultimately responsible to. Cal was a great worker, worth emulating, and a great example of the Lord that he followed.
“Oh no, not Cal”
There were times at Meijer when it was a joy to go to work, and we were doing amazing things, and the team was “in the zone” with the technology and each other. Valuable and cutting-edge technology was in play and the value to the company and customers and community was being realized every day. I have to admit though, that in some of these times I was really jealous of Cal. Cal was one of the architects who had access to “The Lab” at Meijer, which was a place of emerging and expensive and amazing technology that was acquired by budgets I never understood, or more often loaned out as a proof of concept, and there were wires going places and blinking lights and technology that you may have read about, but never actually seen in person. Cal as an “Enterprise Architect” had the keys to the lab, and got to “play” with technology in concept and “Research and Development” before us “Solution Architects” got to use some of it (soon after) to implement concrete products for production use. Cal and his team were a fixture in helping to bring technology solutions to the company that they saw huge benefits from over the years.
So when I heard that pretty much the entire Enterprise Architecture area at Meijer was being cut or reassigned, I went through similar stages of grief as this week when I heard about Cal’s passing. Denial — how/what/who — what was “Meijer” thinking? This was like cutting part of the brain of the organization out to make room for what? Bargaining — there has got to be a project or team that will grab Cal up as a “free agent” and “win the lottery” of having an amazing team member and resource. But this didn’t happen. Cal left Meijer. They chopped off the head of technology and innovation and lost a guy who I thought was irreplaceable, and this was a foreshadowing of other changes in the company and department and my own departure within the year. I do have to confess something at this point. The day after Cal left I “technology scavenged” his cube. Remember I said he got to use and play with cool technology that was nowhere else in the company? He had this amazing 27” HP monitor that was a touch screen and had built-in cameras and I have never seen anything like it before or since. I got in early the next day, and that monitor was disconnected and made its way to my desk. It also came with a stand and riser and a pen to write on it, and I even had to go back the next day for some cables I missed as this thing had connections and power that no normal monitor would, and there was also this cool trackball, but this is getting long anyway. A week or so later when “IT” came to retrieve or restage the cube, it had a stock 17” monitor and a boring mouse for the “next person” to use that machine. When I brought the monitor over, it still had a few bright-green sticky notes from Cal on it for some work he was in the middle of. I kept one of them on the monitor for several weeks as a reminder of Cal, and all the hard work that had been done in front of that big screen, and it was inspiring.
But how did Cal handle the news, that after 29 years of dedicated service to a company that he loved was restructuring, removing, outsourcing, and eliminating large chunks of the organization — and these “groups” were living and breathing and dedicated people that were unceremoniously being let go from the company? You may have already guessed, that Cal again showed the humility, honor, poise, peace, and actions that were not what might reasonably be expected from a person in this situation. Now Cal was upset, confused, and even angry, but not in a way that surfaced as dishonoring or disrespectful, but he did prepare to hand off what we was working on, and left peacefully and gracefully. And these actions of Cal had an impact on me as well. He did it — he “turned the other cheek” he “did not return evil for evil” he “offered his coat” when they took away his cloak, we went another mile, and acted in such a way for people to notice and react and ask “why” and Cal would have the answer that it is the right thing to do, and what we’ve been taught, and point again to the One that we represent and are ultimately responsible to.
I could share a few more Cal stories, but it is late, or actually now “early”, but while the details and context change, the story and message of Cal’s example don’t change. Cal was a great guy, a smart, funny, hard worker, with a huge heart, and a bigger smile, and a humble but confident exterior, with a deep mind and soul. He was quick to listen, slow to speak, but spoke with wisdom, understanding, and grace, mixed with humor, and compassion — an all-around great guy to have on a team and as a friend. We largely lost contact after we both went on to new jobs, and that was a big loss for me personally. To hear about his passing Monday has not left my mind to this moment. I hope other friends can share “Cal moments” — I wish we could meet over a frosty beverage and relive and honor and continue what Cal showed us in this life.
To Cal’s children and family, wow, these few stories and insights about your dad are not news to you. I am sure you have hundreds of memories bouncing around in your mind right now and did not know that the memories and activities and life together would end so soon and so quickly. But you need to know what an amazing man your dad was and how he touched so many people in life, and what a great example he was as he lived a life as a true follower of Christ — he loved you, he loved people, and he loved God, and it showed. To Pam, I don’t know what to say, I have no context or idea what you must be going through. You mentioned in your brief Facebook post not understanding, and perhaps never understanding, why this would happen at this time to Cal, and to you, your children, family, and friends. We often read about the “mystery” of Christ and this life, and the further mystery of marriage as also a path to understanding the love of Christ for all of us. I only met you I think once, maybe twice, along the way at Meijer, and am so sorry this is the situation that brings us all back together. There is some comfort in a reunion with Cal one day in eternity, but that is mixed with the reality of finishing this life without an amazing partner. Thoughts and prayers are not enough to cover such a loss, but are happening, and as needs arise there are a good number of people who would gladly try to help and emulate what Cal would do, through Christ’s teaching and example, as the days progress.
To others that knew Cal, please do share some memories as well. I, again, wish we could do something in person — perhaps a memorial once the limitations and restrictions have been lifted later, please God, this year/summer? And if you knew Cal, but don’t know this Christ interwoven in this post and evident in Cal’s life, I’d be glad to talk more and have that conversation, and there are some coffee shops and places that we could talk one-on-one. And I have a new house, with a cool porch, that will be a great outdoor place once the snow and temperatures have lifted a bit. I miss Cal. I’m still processing it, obviously. But I am grateful, and thankful, and blessed to have known and worked with him, and will try to get through this week being a similar light to those around me.
